The New York Narrative

Hi Everyone,

The 2016 Screen Actor’s Guild was held on Saturday evening and while the show was pretty decent, the Red Carpet was (naturally) “so-so.”

There were some standouts and some majorly fun disasters so naturally The New York Narrative had to put his opinions out into the universe.

So take a look, and and enjoy!

— Christian

Brie Larson- Versace

To no ones surprise, Brie Larson killed it in her right off the Runway Spring 16 Versace dusty blue gown with high slight, crystallized knot details, and contrast back with all the right draping in all the right places. A neutral shoe kept the look balanced and Ms.Larson’s legs long. If I had to nitpick, since this is such a classy way to do va-va-voom and she’s 26, I wish the hair had been a bit more youthful. It’s a tad sever, but it’s nice she kept it up to showcase that gorgeous back.

She has swept award season, so do we have another gorgeous young Oscar winner on our hands a la Jennifer Lawrence?

Alicia Vikander- Louis Vuitton

As the face of Louis Vuitton naturally Alicia Vikander would wear the French brand and boy does she wear it well. Her slightly 80’s (bordering on “Golden Girls” territory) geometric long sleeved gown was modern and sexy as was her stick straight hair and dewy make-up. Whatever custom LV decides to put her in next for the Oscar’s let’s hope it’s as dramatic and chic as her all her looks this awards season.

Rachel McAdams- Elie Saab

It may be a given that Rachel McAdams will don Elie Saab, but it never disappointing. Case in point Ms.McAdam’s incredibly stunning Gothic-Princess vibes she served up from Saturday night. Between that modern platinum textured bob, flawless make-up, and that “look how confident I am” stance? A+.

Julianne Moore- Givenchy

I would be lying if I said this is a Julianne Moore look I love, which breaks my heart as she’s #1 in The New York Narrative’s eyes.

Her metallic Givenchy gown had beyond potential on this incredible actress (it’s a stunning dress) but lack of alterations made the flawless redhead look stumpy doing weird things to every part of her body. Flawless hair and make-up and killer diamonds are all that is good here. Come back to us, Julianne!

Rami Malek- Ovadia & Sons

Rami Malek’s double breasted satin lapel Ovada & Sons (great brand, look em’ up) tux with perfect pocket square and just the right amount of cuff should be everyone’s reference going forward on how to do a tux right. Bravo, Mr.Robot.

Sola Bamis- Lola Wusu

I don’t know who Sola Bamis is nor do I know who Lola Wusu is but I now know I don’t want to know either of them. This is bordering on comical over satirical. Who let her out of the house? How did she fit through the door? I have so many questions…

Demi Moore- Vintage Zac Posen

Demi Moore grabbed a vintage 2003 Zac Posen gown from her closet, had Brad Goreski style her, and showed up looking like a million bucks. She looks age appropriate, chic as hell, and completely effortless. This is how I like my Demi Moore.

Viola Davis- Zac Posen 

From great Zac Posen, to tragic Zac Posen…oh, Viola, WHY? Why, AGAIN are you doing this do us? The only thing I can say here is that her hair, make-up, and the color is perfect for her. The rest? Yikes. Maybe Zac Posen should be off limits to Ms.Davis. Just say no, Viola. Just say no.

Joe Manganiello and Sofia Vergara- Ermenegildo Zegna and Vera Wang

Joe Manganiello is so handsome it’s hard to look at him. What’s even harder to look at is Sofia Vergara because she wore a neon Pink highlighter to the SAG Awards on Saturday.

Mark Ruffalo

Mark Ruffalo looked incredibly handsome in his classic tux but my eyes went straight to his stunning bombshell of a wife, Sunrise Coigney, who was serving in that crushed velvet gown. Old Hollywood Realness right there, folks. Mr.Ruffalo is one lucky guy.

Anna Farris- Naeem Khan

I am blown away by how modern, sophisticated, and sexy but youthful Anna Farris looks in her crimson Naeem Khan high slitted gown. I hope she continues this streak in the future.

Nikolaj Coster- Waldau- Dunhill London

“Game of Thrones” hottie Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (say that five times fast…) gave us the right amount of masculinity in a beautifully cut Navy Dunhill London classic suit with the perfect amount of facial hair and the perfect sized bow-tie. He should be in more stuff, he’s so pretty.

Naomi Watts- Burberry

Naomi Watts was a tall drink of water—if not a tad conservative drink of water—in her lovely lace Burberry column gown with matching berry lip and clutch. I wish her hair had been more textured as it would have revved up this look.

Lori Petty

Obviously “Orange is The New Black” star Lori Petty gets Best Dressed.

Christina Ricci- Christopher Kane

Forever a Fashion Girl, Christina Ricci looked lovely in a pale Pink pleated and lace Christopher Kane gown that fit Wednesday Adams herself like a glove. I’m hoping that dye job is for a role. I like my Ricci Brunette, she’s just too washed out here.

Michael Shannon

Everyone knows I love a good Green moment (so underrated!) and Michael Shannon’s bold Mossy-Gold blazer balanced with classic Black slacks and the perfect dress shoes is just the right amount of Fashion forward for the acclaimed actor. I do with this was saved for someone with a little bit of a tan. A skinny black tie also would have balanced the look a bit more. I digress.

Marisa Tomei- Zuhair Murad

Marisa Tomei loves Fashion. She never has a snooze-worthy moment knowing that every Red Carpet moment counts.

No exception here: our future Aunt May wowed in a long sleeved embellished Teal-Green low cut Zuhair Murad gown that is both incredibly regal and wildly sexy on the 51 year old beauty. That effortless hair and make-up only enhances everything she’s got going on.

Uzo Aduba- Zac Posen

Uzo Aduba clearly still has “OZ” on her mind in an emerald Zac Posen stripe-y gown with empire waist and lots of sheen. I am rather indifferent here.

Eva Longoria- Julien Macdonald

While I applaud Eva Longoria for finally choosing to either show her breasts or legs, I am not sure this Julien Macdonald long sleeved overly embroidered gown was the right choice for the 5’2″ stunner. I get Ms.Longoria has loyalty to longtime stylist Robert Verdi, but maybe it’s time to shake things up? Just a suggestion.

Claire Danes- Stella McCartney

Is anyone else painfully bored by Claire Danes (stale) color blocked Stella McCartney? Definition of yawn…

Kristen Wiig- Roland Mouret

Finally a breath of fresh air on the Red Carpet! Funnylady Kristen Wiig looked modern and cool in her Roland Mouret color blocked jumpsuit with honeycomb embroidery at the bust and a textured pony tail. I want more of this from Ms.Wiig during her “Zoolander 2” and “Ghostbusters” promo tour. Absolutely one of the best of the night.

Our Ladx J

I am actually at a loss for words here.

Melora Hardin

What is happening here? Really? What is happening here? Did someone tell Melora Hardin the dress code was what a hooker/stripper/I assume Denny’s waitress would wear to a wedding? This is a joke and she should have been asked to leave.

Nicole Kidman- Gucci

From tragic to regal, Nicole Kidman looked stunning in a custom trompe l’oeil Gucci sequin gown with the bounciest extensions and an actual smile from the statuesque actress. Ms.Kidman’s tiered gown is just the right shades of sugary and is a nice change from the more severe pieces the Aussie beauty generally chooses.

Kate Winslet- Armani Prive

Apparently the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” mentality is going nowhere with Kate Winslet.

Emelia Clarke- Dior

Emelia Clarke went from Goth at the Globes to Disney Princess at the SAG’s in her low cut full skirted electric Pink Dior ballgown. I appreciate the change, but think I like Ms.Clarke with more of an edge. Her hair and make-up though deserves an award. How was this the only Dior we saw on Saturday?

Carol Burnett- Bob Mackie

One of my personal icons, Carol Burnett, was honored at the SAG’s on Saturday for her incredible career and looked gorgeous doing it. Donning one of my other personal icons, Bob Mackie, Ms.Burnett turned to her longtime collaborator (who also has done wonders with Cher, unless you’ve been living under a rock you should know this) choosing a beautiful emerald suit with embellished top and her signature strawberry shag. Ms.Burnett is an absolute treasure and if you disagree, we’ll have a really, really big problem.

Alexis Bledel- Bibhu Mohapatra

Rory Gilmore…er…I mean, Alexis Bledel looked lovely in a periwinkle Bibhu Mohapatra body-con gown with metallic waist detailing and bouncy Brunette waves. She looks exactly the same as she did in “Gilmore Girls”Season 1. What is she taking?

Queen Latifah- Michael Costello

SAG winner of the evening Queen Latifah wore an intricate embellished long sleeved Michael Costello Black gown with a cool-girl topknot and perfect make-up.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus- Monique Lhullier

Julia Louis-Dreyfus looks like she’s playing dress up. Her double strand bow diamond necklace and frothy strapless gown choice seem rather a young choice for this wildly talented woman. It’s an all around disappointment. Try next time, babe.

Kaley Cuoco- Ramona Keveza

And look who’s right back on my bad side…Kaley Cuoco borrowed Goldie Hawn’s hairstyle from “Overboard” and lost half her dress on the way to the SAG’s. We get it, you work out.

Sophie Turner- Carolina Herrera

Sophie Turner is 19 and looked more regal and sophisticated then most of the broads on this Red Carpet.

Sarah Paulson- Armani Prive

Never one to shy away from a Fashion moment, Sarah Paulson (who is beyond on “American Crime Story: The People v. O.J. Simpson,” if you’re not aware) was out of this world cool in an Armani Prive Black column gown with electric Blue and Pink feathering detail at the bodice and a blunt bob. Modernity never looked so good.

Diane Lane- Roland Mouret

Diane Lane does not age. Diane Lane always looks gorgeous. Diane Lane looked perfect on Saturday evening. End of discussion.

Julianna Marguilies- Antonio Berardi

Julianna Marguilies was all kinds of radiant in her crisp Antonio Berardi halter gown with bustier detail and a back-swept do. How smokin’ hot is Ms.Marguilies (younger—you go, girl!) husband? Best accessory of the night.

Laverne Cox- Prabal Gurung

Laverne Cox put her best foot forward—literally—in a brick Red chiffon Prabal Gurung Goddess gown with cape-like detail at the shoulder and gorgeous bouncy locks. Minus the Angelina Jolie trying to hard leg, this is a home-run.

Tina Fey- Prabal Gurung

She may have blended into the Red Carpet a bit, but Tina Fey’s simple and chic Red halter gown gave the beauty an air of confidence I haven’t seen from Ms.Fey in a while.

Priyanka Chopra- Monique Lhullier

Public Service Announcement: These tacky Prom-esque princess dresses have got to go.

Rooney and Kate Mara- Valentino

Rooney and Kate Mara were both dressed by Valentino and while both gowns are really stunning, do either of them look like they care or want to be there? Tim Burton corpses on the Red Carpet. Rooney did have a killer ponytail that was rather lustworthy.

Lily Rabe- Lela Rose

“American Horror Story” alum Lily Rabe embraced her inner Spring choosing an Easter-themed Lela Rose gown that was sugary and somehow cool at the same time. The hair/make-up/gown color is a bit jarring, bordering on garish, but it’s interesting nonetheless.

Amy Landecker- SAFiYAA

Future “Doctor Strange” and current “Transparent” actress Amy Landecker had a pretty good outing on Saturday evening in a high neck SAFiYAA gown with sexy slit and metallic detailing at the sides of her dress. Hair down to one side would have kept this a little cooler and less severe.

Saoirse Ronan- Michael Kors

Adorable and appropriate, Saoirse Ronan’s Pink leopard print Michael Kors gown was a great fit for the 21 year old. Between that youthful hair and light make-up, she took cute to another level.

Patricia Arquette

Another Patricia Arquette Fashion moment…great…

Susan Sarandon- Max Mara

You wish you can look as good as Susan Sarandon at 69. The iconic actress let her iconic chest out of her finely tailored Max Mara suit, pushed up and out by a lovely bustier that was working overtime. I love that she has always stayed a redhead.

I have no idea what her daughter is wearing nor do I want to address it.

Julie Bowen- Kaufman Franco

Julie Bowen’s metallic to Black Kaufman Franco gown is just the right amount of “I put in the effort but I’m not nominated so I’m just here to look nice,” to get a pass from The New York Narrative. Props for matching her manicure to her clutch.

January Jones- Schiaparelli

I applaud January Jones for taking on such a daring Fashion-forward risk, but, this is a gown that should be saved for editorial and never should have seen the light of a Red Carpet.

There is way too much gown for it to even remotely look good in photographs from any angle. The back of this gown is exquisite and should have been saved for the cover shot of Harper’s Bazaar. Also, January Jones? Really? Out of anyone they could have lent this to…

Molly Parker- Francesco Paolo Salerno

I think the “House of Cards” actress thought she was at the Superhero MET Gala from 2008.

Helen Mirren- Jenny Peckham

“Hello, I’m Helen Mirren and I just put all the 20-something trollops to shame.” Legit, Helen Mirren is perfect. QUEEN.

Idris Elba- Ermenegildo Zegna

I don’t even know what to say about Idris Elba because he’s like looking directly into the sun: too hot and you have to look away. Gorgeous piece of man.

All images courtesy of Getty.

© Copyright 2016 The New York Narrative. All rights reserved.